


Neslomlennaya (or how we are strong according to tony stark)

by sunbean72



Category: Avengers, Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Brainwashing, F/M, Internalized Misogyny, Misogyny, Natasha Romanov & Tony Stark Friendship, Natasha Romanov Feels, POV Natasha Romanov, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Powerful Women, Sexism, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-07-02 12:32:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15796605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunbean72/pseuds/sunbean72
Summary: Natasha needs help after someone triggering her Russian brainwashing leaves her feeling sad and vulnerable.A/N this fic will veer wildly from canon stories and relationship but we're looking at a post-civil war pre-infinity war fic that explores a few moments between Natasha and Tony, my once brotp before civil war kinda ruined it lol. I know I'm usually all about Tony and all that, but fair warning this is about a certain beloved Russian who deserves better.





	Neslomlennaya (or how we are strong according to tony stark)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Woland](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Woland/gifts).



It started with forgiveness. 

A broken heart like Tony's didn't hold anger and hatred very well, and though he hadn't forgotten and he still had miles to go before he could look Steve Rogers in the face let alone work with him, he already felt the easing that came with beginning to forgive. Rhodey helped him more than his fair share, but he'd insisted all along that he wasn't going to be bitter and blaming of anyone or else it would kill him sooner than any injury ever would. Not his body, but his spirit, he love of helping others, his kindness; hatred did that. He didn't blame Vision, he didn't blame Tony. He didn't blame Sam, he didn't blame Steve Rogers. He didn't expect Tony to take the same view but just lent him a listening ear whenever he needed but it was pretty hard to see how Rhodey overcame his inclinations to find someone to blame and be angry and not at least try to follow his example.

He moved on and he opened his heart to Pepper, to Peter. He poured his soul into what he was best at-- saving others. His philanthropies _thrived._ Stark Industries hired seven new people to R &D the first year of the September Foundation funding alone and they had already started saving the world. There was a very promising young woman who had figured out some incredible theories on nanotech that had been exactly the insight he needed to finish his own project, not to mention the man who had discovered a particularly effective wound treatment option. It was still in very early phases but it had helped stop bleeding and was also, again, always-- promising.

The world held a lot of promise. Any time he wanted to shy away from everything, he stared his despair and lack of trust and abused faith and hope in the eye and with a _screw you_ to the darkness in his mind and heart, he pushed back _harder,_ only more determined to make the world a better place in spite of it all. Come what may, he would always fight, always fight. He would never surrender to the despair that threatened him, it was not who he was.

Sure, it was rough. There was no denying that even with the tiny ember of hope he tried to coax into a flame, it hurt to face every day knowing what had happened and also knowing that his once teammates were out there, operating without him. With the Avengers team shattered and scattered, Avengers Compound had become a giant monument to his failure to keep the team together. As days passed and no resolution came aside from the sorry excuse for a sorry letter, Tony built a mission-ready team from the ashes of the old team and he felt less hopeful and determined and more afraid. He'd failed once already, with the best and brightest at his side. Now he had no choice but to soldier on as best he could and hope no one got hurt. 

Or, at least, if someone had to get hurt, it wasn't Rhodey this time. And it certainly couldn't be the kid. Vision either, who was worth twelve of him on a good day and could lift Thor's hammer when he never could. He never would.

It was with these thoughts flurrying within his mind and heart when one day, on a mission, Tony sent nanotech particles from his new armor to protect Peter in a moment of vulnerability. Of course, the nanotech suit works with brainwaves, and he was still perfecting the technology; all his thoughts and intent had been to shield Peter, who was still not using the Iron Spider uniform (they'd agreed as a neighborhood Spider-man he would wear his upgraded uniform and wait until after college to join the Avengers and use the more advanced suit) and therefore had a very few very worrisome vulnerabilities--

He was so busy worrying about Peter that he didn't even register FRIDAY's warning, and her automated response system was only a moment too late to deflect what was sure to be a killing blow-- the nanotech armor had left his flank incredibly exposed, although it functioned perfectly as a shield that reached Peter a split moment before the lethal looking laser. The laser bounced off the shield and the nanoparticles were so light and flexible, Peter didn't even notice, didn't even feel it in the moment.

Tony felt something slam him to the ground with more force than he'd thought possible; even FRIDAY hadn't had a chance to register the threat and react but a moment later there was a flash of red hair and then a burst of light as the figure, dressed in a skin-tight black uniform of Tony's own design, took down the weapon that had so nearly killed him and Peter Parker.

"Whoa!" Peter said, swinging down and webbing up the man who moved to run as soon as his weapon was destroyed by the Widow Bites. "That was crazy! Mr. Stark are you all right? Who's that lady?" He didn't wait for the answer and Tony pointed him off to help wrap things up with law enforcement.

The red-haired woman leaned over Tony, who was flat on his back on the ground. "That grazed you, Stark, you idiot," the woman snapped, pulling down the cloth covering the lower part of her face. The pretty, angry face of Natasha Romanoff stared down at him.

"What... what the hell are you doing here?" Tony asked, stunned.

"I was tracking that same weapon's cache you were. It was a holdover from the Vulture's experiments, we came across it in California and I followed the buyer here. Tony, that thing packs a hell of a punch, what happened? Your armor, something went wrong--"

"No, it didn't," Tony replied sitting up carefully. The nanoparticles slowly drained into his arc reactor as law enforcement moved in to take the villain of the week into custody. One that had, granted, come closer than much smarter and more determined counterparts to killing Iron Man, if not Spider-man as well. Natasha saw his hands shake as he pushed himself to stand. Her heart clenched, wondering if he was more upset about his brush with death or seeing her again.

"Incredible," she murmured, watching the nanoparticles disappear. "Tony? Is that--?"

"My shiny new arc reactor," and she didn't miss the way his jaw clenched, but he was leaning over, cradling his injury and she saw all his old tells that he was in pain. A certain wrinkle around his mouth, a particular crease on his forehead, a tightness across his shoulders that only came from trying to hide his pain.

"Tony," she said sadly. She knew immediately what had sparked the re-implantation of the arc reactor. He needed to feel protected now that he no longer felt protected by his team, the once Avengers. 

He stared hard into her face, searching it for something, something, even she didn't know what. The pain in his face didn't fade but he reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. "It's good to see you, thank you for saving my life but you better skedaddle. Ross had special agents planted in the response teams just to keep an eye out for you guys, he almost caught Wanda with Vision."

"You know about them?"

"Of course I do, I'm not an idiot," he said tightly, and Natasha watched blood trace rivulets down his fingers as he pressed his hand to his side. 

"Yes you are," she insisted grimly, reaching for him. "We've got to get you to Medical."

He turned and stared into her face, disbelieving, annoyed. "What's this 'we' business? You missed the grand tour of the Raft so you're looking for a VIP pass?"

"Scott and Clint got a deal. I think I can get one too."

"Are you insane? What about Rogers and the rest?"

"We sorted it out Stark," she said with irritation. "But it's going to be for nothing if you stand here and bleed out while we debate it!"

His lips tightened and he took a step only to nearly collapse when he tried to put weight on his leg on the side of his injury and Natasha caught him. She felt him stiffen under her hands, shaking. "It's okay Stark, I'm not going to hurt you." He'd closed his eyes against the pain and she saw a crease appear on his forehead as she spoke. She was glad he had his eyes closed; she didn't want to see what was in his eyes at that moment. 

...

Surprisingly, getting the US to agree to a deal was the easy part. Everett Ross from the CIA (which had absorbed many of her SHIELD counterparts after the purging of HYDRA) had pulled some strings as a favor to the king of Wakanda; T'Challa himself vouched for her re-admittance after speaking with Tony. Thaddeus Ross had been reluctant to the extreme about readmitting her; Scott and Clint had gotten a deal with a promise to not participate in any heroic activities, and Natasha was asking for field duty. However, there was no denying that they were short-handed and could use her expertise. Thaddeus capitulated and her re-admittance was working its way through committee to be voted on by UN representatives.

She was staying (being held) at Avenger's Compound with a tracking device implanted, an ankle bracelet set to incapacitate her if she left the building, and guards posted at all exit points. The King had stopped by the Compound on his way home after visiting his education center in Oakland for a week. He had talked a long time behind closed doors with Tony (who was out of Medical but still on activity restriction). When he came to visit Natasha he was polite and optimistic. The frowning Dora Milaje at his side provided enough intimidation and power for the both of them, however.

"I wish you the best of luck with the UN Councils tomorrow, Ms. Romanoff. I hope that my goodwill will buy you some of theirs," T'Challa said with a bow.

"Thank you King T'Challa. I have wanted to apologize in person for attacking you at the airport, I never got a chance--" she'd never been to Wakanda; Steve had left with the remnants of the team only a few days after getting them out of the Raft, leaving only Bucky Barnes in the care of the Wakandans.

He waved off her words with a shadow of a smile. "No need. It was a long time ago, and you were preventing me from harming an innocent man. For that, I owe you my gratitude. You know probably know that my sister took it personally, however, and my new suit is impervious to electrocution." He finally gave in to the smile that he'd been repressing, taking her hand to say goodbye. His eyes turned thoughtful. The young king seemed to have aged years in the time since she'd seen him last; apparently taking over the throne had matured him. "I'm not sure I understand why you returned, Ms. Romanoff. I had understood that you were loyal to Steve Rogers. My own intelligence in Wakanda has been very favorable concerning your efforts."

"We... do our best with the resources we have, King T'Challa. But I was never on Tony's side or Steve's side, I was on the Avenger's side. I'm tired of being in the shadows; I've had enough of that to last a lifetime. SHIELD was supposed to be a way out of that and I lost everything when it fell, but with Tony in charge of the Avengers, I think maybe it's my shot at a second chance of being above board. I really want it. Steve understood how hard it was for me to not be able to help against that terrorist attack in France. He knew I needed to at least try to come back." 

T'Challa nodded his understanding, still watching her face. "Best wishes, Ms. Romanoff." He nodded to her as he left.

Natasha watched him leave, feeling a squirm of anxiety snake through her abdomen. The truth was, the UN representatives had been far less accepting of her proposed reinstatement than she had hoped. Her long history as a spy and her willingness to disobey the laws when she didn't like them didn't exactly endear her to them. A few people had even been convinced she was spying for the ex-Avengers, meant to pass them information about missions where they were forbidden by law to intervene or receive intelligence, but Tony had given her excellent representation in the form of a man named William McMichaels, a competent if not somewhat frightening lawyer who was cool toward Natasha but fought expertly and fiercely for her to be reinstated. He had managed to get Natasha's case fast-tracked, an extraordinary accomplishment given the slow machinations of governments. He had leveraged Tony's injury to expedite things, otherwise it could have taken months or years for anything to be decided. Within a few days, she would know if she was rejoining Tony or... retiring. There could be no doubt, given her conversations with Scott Lang and Clint Barton that retirement would be enforced by gunpoint if necessary.

Natasha paced the spacious room. Tomorrow was a big day-- the day they would vote after the UN delegates were given a chance to question her in person. She had left her friends, the only family she felt she had left, to come back to Tony and the Avengers, but she knew in her heart that Tony was right about everything-- the need for the Accords, the limits that should be placed on their activities, the fact that a greater threat was looming and they need cohesion. Perhaps it was out of her hands, but she had come to realize that her place was by Tony's side. 

Perhaps it would erase a little red in her ledger she'd often had cause to regret-- a single page piece of paper that had once summarized her opinion of Tony's suitability for the Avengers-- Iron Man yes, Tony Stark no. She'd been wrong and she wanted to make it right.

...

"But consider!" The delegate from Prera was once again objecting. Natasha watched carefully; she knew the small but influential country was not the one in control here; someone was pulling the strings. From the cold and superior way the Russian representative was watching her, she thought she might know who. "Ms. Romanoff has proven herself to not be suitable for hero work! Her case file is rife with examples! There are many questions of the appropriateness of her joining the team."

"If you have specific objections, now is your chance to bring them to the council's attention." The council chair had already called Prera to order twice. They seemed determined to thwart Natasha's return. 

"Aside from her dubious past, there are other concerns," the Prera representative said, standing. "Physically, there are considerations. Unlike Iron Man or Vision, she doesn't have the bodily strength for the rigorous exertions that may be required. We feel that she would serve better as a support to her team from a safe location. Given the fact that women are naturally more alert due to their double x chromosome, they are much better suited to supporting loved ones such as husbands, teammates, children, brothers, sisters, parents, and friends. It is their primary role in society."

For a moment, the words surprised Natasha so much that she didn't respond. She had been living in the US as part of SHIELD for so long that she'd forgotten or perhaps chosen not to think of how some other countries still thought of women as inferior and to be subjugated to men. "I... that... that is to say, I've passed every physical test that has been put to me, mister delegate," she said in Preran; it was similar to Russian and Estonian, it hadn't been difficult to learn. Earbud translators relayed the conversation to the rest of the people in the room and she took the moment to try and recover herself, having been blindsided by the attack.

She glanced up at her lawyer, who was frowning, then at Tony, who was attending as an observer. His eyebrows were raised and he looked at her questioningly. It was the first time in the hours-long grilling he'd seen her stumble at all. "Women in my country are not as bold as you, Ms. Romanoff," the odious man continued. "We believe that women's role in society should be the three k's-- kinder, kuchen, kirche. Perhaps if more women took these roles more seriously, the Avengers would not even be needed! Adding a woman to a team that services the entire world and not just progressive places like the West must take into account the cultural objections that may arise!" This pronouncement was met by murmurs of surprise and outrage, and a few supportive ones as well from countries that still had deep-seated beliefs about the roles of women.

"Would the delegate from Prera please keep objections to Ms. Romanoff's suitability to her specifically and not her gender?" Her lawyer requested loudly. "That has nothing to do with whether or not she should be on the Avengers!" He again had to bang the gavel to bring the room to order.

"It has everything to do!" The man protested. "My country's concerns are valid! You cannot simply bully those who don't agree with you into submission, that is precisely what the Accords were promised to prevent!" The council chair banged his gavel again, frowning at the muttering and exclamations the new attack had caused. "Look at how she is dressed! That may be permissible in America, but in our country, that would invite attack. I believe Ms. Romanoff's inclusion on the team would set a very bad example for the young girls in our country that deserve to be protected from this kind of thing."

"I believe that it was me that saved your Prime Minister from the Hydra kidnapping," Natasha suggested with a smirk, but she looked more pale than usual.

"Nonetheless, historians can peg the point where a society begins its sharpest decline at the instant when women begin to take part, on an equal footing with men, in political and business affairs, since this means that the men are decadent and the women are no longer women. This is not a sermon on the role or position of women; it is a statement of bald and basic fact! We must put up with it in our government positions, but I refuse to allow a woman to have access to my country as a super hero. What if she is hormonal and cannot make a correct decision when it is life or death? I ask you!"

The room erupted at this and it took a full three minutes for everyone to calm down. There were many, men and women, who took exception to this pronouncement, but there were others who agreed with it entirely and seemed thankful someone had spoken up.

"We'll take a thirty-minute break," the chairman said. "We will reconvene then."

...

Natasha resisted the urge to stand up and pace. Tony fidgeted restlessly; she could tell his wound was bothering him and he was anxious about something. A moment later the lawyer came in, after consulting someone in the hall. "Ms. Romanoff," he greeted her, merely nodding at Tony. 

"What is the _deal_ with that guy?" Tony asked abruptly, his face tense. "What was that load of crap anyway?"

The lawyer looked at her expectantly. "I think I understand what he's doing. Is it working?"

"What?" Natasha looked at him, utterly baffled.

 _"'What do you do when things go wrong? Oh! You sing a song!'"_ He said, watching her face. It crumpled into anger and understanding.

"Where did you hear about that?" She said, standing up, falling back into a defensive position. Seeing her posture, Tony stood up as well, but the lawyer raised his hands, supplicating. 

"What is it, what's that mean?"

"It's from a Disney song. Snow White, as a matter of fact. Something young Russian girls were brainwashed with when they were being trained as spies and assassins."

"Okay, one, that's... super weird and creepy. Two, what the hell does that have to do with anything?"

"You should know, you hired me for my knowledge of Natasha's past." Natasha's head whipped toward Tony and he reached over for her wrist.

"I just needed someone who could defend you," he said soothingly. "I reached out to some old SHIELD lackeys. Maria sent him, okay? She vouched for him."

"Actually she can vouch for me herself. Remember Budapest? Remember Stanley?"

"You were Stanley? You saved our lives!"

"Yes I was your handler. I've been on your side for many years. What we're facing now is a threat from the Russians. They're trying to trigger you, Natasha, so be careful."

"Trigger how?" Tony asked warily.

"We were trained from infancy that women are helpless tools in the hands of powerful and intelligent men. We watched Snow White constantly as a guide to how to behave-- when we were killing people, at least. He's tapping into that training to try and get me to stumble."

"It's very likely the Russians have more motivations than most to keep Ms. Romanoff out of the Avenger's team. I believe they still believe her to be their property."

Natasha clenched her hands into tight fists. Now that William had pointed out what the man was doing, her body's visceral reaction made more sense. She couldn't remember much of her brainwashing; it was in its very nature to be forgotten, but her muscles held the memory of it. Hearing the delegate's words against her as a woman should have been water off a duck's back, but it had been so long since she was so blatantly confronted with men or women who thought of her as simply an object to be used, like an animal to be trained and manipulated and mutilated for their own end and gains. A steely look came over her.

"Don't worry, gentlemen," she said calmly. "Now that I know the game he's playing, it will be fine. Let's get this over with."

...

Natasha withstood the last portion of her questioning with calm resolve. Wiliam had suggested that she play the dumb blonde a bit to placate her opponents; he knew as well as she did that the more assertive, confident, and calm she appeared, the less they would like her, the more agitated their anger. The entire thing just made her so angry and upset, but in the end, Natasha received the votes she needed to be reinstated to the Avengers, officially.

She thought she would feel more elated, and she was happy, but another part of her felt tired and anxious. She'd worked hard her entire career; she'd killed men, outsmarted them, manipulated them into doing what she wanted. Why did some idiot have the power to make her feel so inferior? She tried to shrug it off. It wasn't the first time and it wasn't the last that someone had underestimated her because of her gender, and she would find a way to use it to her advantage like she always did. 

So why did she feel so depressed?

She had a headache; she waved off offers to celebrate with a night on the town. She appreciated the gesture, but she wanted to stay in. She didn't want to think about doing her hair, or how her makeup might be construed, or the length of her dress. She missed Steve and Sam. She missed Wanda; the pretty woman encountered the same kind of thing in Sokovia, but no one dared to challenge her-- her power was uncontested. Natasha found it somewhat ironic that the evilest and most corrupted organization on the planet, HYDRA, was also the least sexist. It cared only for power, not the gender of the person holding it. 

Though, come to think of it, HYDRA had contended with Peggy Carter. It wasn't surprising then that they understood the power of a woman who knew her value.

 _If only everyone were as awesome as HYDRA,_ Natasha thought, kicking off one of her high heels with perhaps more vigor than was necessary as she entered her living quarters. The shoe went sailing across the room, right toward Tony Stark's face, but fortunately, he caught it.

"Wow, so first you save my life now you try to kill me. 'Iron Man Killed by Flying Footwear,' I can see the headlines now."

"Tony, what the hell! You scared the crap out of me," she said after recovering from her surprise and worry that the shoe would hit his face. She grabbed the shoe out of his hand.

"Well I was expecting a warmer welcome, I can come back later to de-bracelet you if you want," he replied sarcastically with a raised eyebrow, holding up the key to her ankle bracelet. "That is, unless you'd prefer to get it off yourself and receive a nice nap when it zaps you."

"Sounds good actually," she deadpanned. "Thanks."

He chuckled at her sarcasm and followed her to the couch, gesturing for her to give him her foot. With gentle precision, he unlocked it and removed it the ankle bracelet that had been monitoring her locations down to the half foot. She wiggled her foot back and forth, stretching her freed muscles. She sighed, remembering the implant in her back, under her shoulder blade where she couldn't reach it had she felt the inclination. It was to remain in place until her "trial basis" was completed in two years. Until then, she had to follow the Accords she signed without breaking them. There was no going back to Steve and the others if she changed her mind. Thinking of it made her back itch and she squirmed, struggling to scratch the impossible to reach spot.

Tony laughed; the first time she'd heard it since... well. Maybe it had been years since she'd heard him laugh. She couldn't help but smile at the sound, as foul as her mood was, as he pressed her shoulder to turn her around and scratched her back for her, figuring out immediately what her problem was. "Better?"

"Ahh, yes. Who was the sadistic monster that had the idea to put the tracker in that spot anyway?"

He smiled and shrugged. "Not me. I argued that if you wanted it out you'd find a way anyway but I was overruled."

"Trusting soul," she commented, watching him.

"Hardly." He sighed and rubbed his face and sat next to her on the couch, so close their arms touch. The fact that he allowed it, the fact that he came here in person, the fact that he _wasn't_ a trusting soul thanks in no small part to her but he still came here for her anyway and made a path for her to rejoin him and hired her legal counsel, all of that, the ice-queen melted and at his touch she started to cry. 

She hadn't in years, not since Bruce disappeared. That had been a messy week, no two ways about it, but it was understandable. This she didn't quite understand, but she didn't try to control it either and once the tears started flowing she just put her face in her hands and leaned into Tony's embrace as he had lifted his arm in invitation and let herself have a good _cry._

"Come on, kid," he said gently when her tears had slowed somewhat. "Here." He handed her some tissues as she got her emotions back under control. He smiled a sad, sympathetic smile as she looked at him with chagrin. She could only imagine how she looked-- her makeup washed off completely or smudged all over her face, her eyes swollen and her nose dripping. 

She felt so gross. So unlovable. So weak and foolish and stupid for even caring an iota about what anyone thought. It grated on her that she cared at all, especially knowing that it was a purposeful manipulation to trigger her, but in the safety of the compound and Tony's companionship, she couldn't really help but give in to her feelings for a moment.

"That guy got to you, didn't he?" Tony asked. Her lip trembled and she nodded, feeling oh so foolish. 

"I know he wrong, but... it was ingrained in me as a kid, you know? And when someone starts talking like that, I don't know, it doesn't always bother me, it shouldn't bother me at all, I know they're wrong. I could kill them three times before they hit the ground, but I have to sit there and listen to them talk that way about women because they have power over me."

Tony said nothing but pulled a pillow onto his lap and patted it as an offer for her to lay down. She cried, brushing away the occasional tear and all he did was listen to her and brush her red hair away from her tear stained face, offering sympathetic sounds in response to what she said at times. 

"It' stupid. I'm stronger than this. I'm stupid."

"Listen," Tony said gently, making her sit up to face him. He seemed serious, his eyes dim and sad. She saw in an instant all the weight of his world and life experiences was on his heart and though she'd never known Tony to cry even at Peggy's funeral, she saw not what was hidden but that there were things hidden, not for everyone to see, not for everyone to know, not even her who had once dared to infiltrate his life at his lowest and most vulnerable moments and made judgments about him. 

"Listen. Of course you feel that way. You feel stupid, I understand. But you're not. You're so smart, Nat. You're so brave. You've faced so much in your life, you've gone through so many hard things. You're on the other side of a lot of chaos and fear and suffering. I don't pretend to know first hand what it's like to be subjected to all that as a kid. But look at you. Okay? Just look. Just being here proves them wrong. You cared about helping people anyway. You wanted to make things right anyway. You tried your damned hardest anyway. It's your softness. Right? It makes you strong. If you didn't care, if none of it mattered then--" he spread his hands. "They win. They were right. But I've seen you. So competent. So much stronger than any of us, and all of us. You think I didn't see that? I did. I appreciate you."

"I don't know that I've helped that much, Tony. Hearing everything he said I can't help but think-- what if it's like he said? What if what I am is not good? What if I am inferior, weak, stupid? Always beneath you guys on the team. You know?" She would never have dared to voice such things, even to herself, but Tony's kindness and openness touched her heart and she said what she often heard her inner voice whisper in times of darkness or despair. "What if he's not wrong, but I'm wrong? I've made so many mistakes. I hurt you. Others, lots of people. Broken more trusts than I can count. I'm so good at it. I'm... I thought I was more than a tool in their hand, but what if... I think I've been fooling myself this whole time."

"No," Tony murmured, his heart breaking for her. 

"Tony... Tony. I think. I'm too broken. This just shows me. I've tried so hard for so long, and I... I don't know. I thought maybe with Bruce... something. Lasting. Real. Something. Important. That I could love. And be loved. You know? Not just that I needed a relationship or some BS like that, that's not what I mean."

"I know."

"But I'm too broken, that's what I'm trying to say. Nothing gets in by me except darkness. Because of who I am, what happened to me, things I can't change. I left Steve and the others because I wanted to help you Tony, but I think now I've made a terrible mistake. I'll just ruin everything."

Tony knew it was just the trauma talking; just the backlash from her triggered brainwashing. He knew that within the sad woman before him was all the strength and resolve that it would take to not only fight against the discrimination that was so ingrained but also the fortitude and ability to help create a world that pushed back against it. If not for herself, then for everyone in the future, she would never be happy unless she was fighting against it, no matter how bleak it seemed to her at the moment.

"Come here." He wrapped his arms around her, wondering if Pepper would be better suited for this, or anyone besides him. But he was here and he cared, and he supposed that would have to be enough for the moment. He tightened his arms around her. "I was going to tell you, you're not broken. But. Maybe you are a little, huh? But I'll tell you this much. Sometimes broken things work better, okay? Some broken things work better. I've fixed a lot of things, tried to fix a lot of things, and they're always better. Broken hearts, they're better Nat. They know what love is. Love is never wasted. Bruce and you... I'm sorry, kid, I really am. But would you take it back?"

He felt her shake her head slowly against his shoulder and sighed. "No. No, you wouldn't. And it's not wasted. You and Bruce needed to love each other, even if it was only for a while, and you can keep that even if it didn't work out. Now. I know that asshole's words are going to stick in your craw a little bit for a while, and we'll just accept that and move on. But if it would help you feel better, I might consider letting you eat my stash of Ben and Jerry's while we watch Legally Blonde."

This made her laugh and she pulled away, looking into Tony's face. "Thanks Tony. Thank you. For taking me back, for saying those things. I don't know... I don't know if you're right about it all or not. But it sure is nice to have your voice in my head to compete with those idiots."

"Anytime. Now. Stark Raving Hazelnuts or Hulk-a-Hulk of Burning Fudge?"

**Author's Note:**

> In all honesty, Natasha coming back was just a way to talk about how awful it can feel to be subjected to sexist rhetoric and it was an excuse to let Tony comfort her because, like a lot of women, I feel so crappy sometimes when I encounter it and thought this might cheer other people up if they encounter it.


End file.
